For IBD patients, it can feel as though we are constantly running on a hamster wheel of chronic illness. The symptoms may go away, but they often come back. The fatigue may falter, but soon, your battery is depleted. In the past, I’ve written extensively about self-care and patience with treatments, but I wanted to share about ways that I’ve learned to be well in times of sickness.
Lately, I’ve been delving further into disability literature and critical theory, attempting to find some sort of theoretical basis for the suffering we undergo as IBD patients. In particular, I have found a great deal of solace in Susan Sontag’s ‘Illness as Metaphor,’ penned in 1978. In this seminal piece, Sontag writes, “everyone who is born holds dual citizenship, in the kingdom of the well and in the kingdom of the sick.”
To be in good health is fleeting, even when it is taken for granted. Being diagnosed with Crohn’s in the middle of my undergraduate experience has taught me this much. The grueling sensation of grappling with a disability, however, comes with a paired urgency that we must appreciate the good moments as they come. Being an IBD patient has made me more present-minded, aiming to be content with the present rather than being so focused on the uncertainties ahead.
Taking walks is one way that I incorporate wellness into my daily routine: so important to take breaks and remember what’s truly important!
Learning to prioritize wellness is no easy feat; it certainly requires a growth mindset. As with anything in life, a learning curve is difficult to adapt to, but prioritizing one’s well-being could not be important. While I’ve written about the importance of accommodations in the post-COVID era, it’s crucial to extend such compassion to ourselves!
In the same piece, Sontag finishes by noting, “how reluctant we are to admit that there is only one kingdom and some of us simply have yet to travel its rockier terrains. It is inevitable. We will all need care. We will all long for accommodation. Until then, we can choose to what extent we want to indulge the fantasy that wellness is a condition we have somehow earned, instead of an ephemeral luck that is guaranteed to run out.”
My challenge for our readers is to pause, take a deep breath, and recount what you are feeling at this very moment. In recognizing that we do live in two kingdoms, one of health and one of sickness, we ought to grant ourselves a chance to be present, wherever our lives may take us in the next breath.