By: Maalvika Bhuvansunder
Crohn's, is a term I am familiar with now, to the extent it feels that I am synonymous with it. In medical terms, Crohn's is defined as an inflammation in the gastrointestinal tract, which manifests in symptoms such as abdominal pain, unexpected weight loss, and many more (Baumgart & Sandborn, 2012). However, all I could understand was that I am in for a journey filled with lots of pain.
It was in 2016, that my health started to get worse. I lost a lot of weight, was not able to eat properly, and was moody all the time. My family and I initially thought that maybe it was the flu or food poisoning. However, my health never seemed to improve. Deciding to go to the doctor, I had made up my mind to expect the worst. To my pleasant surprise, I was diagnosed with anaemia. I say pleasant because my mind had made up that I had cancer, and in comparison to cancer, anaemia was a piece of cake. Despite getting treated for anaemia, my health remained the same, with no improvement whatsoever. Later, I was diagnosed with amebiasis (Pritt & Clark, 2008). I was relieved thinking finally, I have a proper diagnosis. Things seemed to improve for a while; however, it started to get worse. At the suggestion of my GP, we met a gastroenterologist. Now, before this, I was completely unaware of such a discipline in medicine, so my family and I went in completely blank, not knowing what to expect.
“All I could understand was that I am in for a journey filled with lots of pain. ”
The first thing my gastro told me, based on my previous reports, was there seemed to be some sort of inflammation in my abdominal area. I was told to get a colonoscopy done, only after which the doctor could confirm a diagnosis.
On the way home, I started to research the entire colonoscopy procedure. I was stressed out reading the process and was hoping to find a way out of undergoing the procedure. Thinking back to it, I am not sure what I dreaded more, the prep process of having to drink that awful colon cleanse, or the actual colonoscopy itself. Had I known before what colonoscopy was, I might have been less skeptical about it. The day of the colonoscopy went pretty smoothly, and I was drowsy for most of the day. We were not told anything that day and had to return a few days later for the official diagnosis. We again went in completely blank, not knowing what to expect. That is when I got THE diagnosis, CROHN’S. Now, I had never heard such a term and neither had my parents. The doctor’s explanation regarding my treatment plan just sounded gibberish to me. The one thing that I could not take my mind off was, this condition does not have a cure; it will be with me for the duration of my entire life.
We always hear how an early diagnosis can solve half the problems; however, with any gastro-intestinal condition, the dilemma is that the symptoms are very similar, and getting an early diagnosis may not always be possible. From personal experience though, I feel with IBD it doesn't really matter when we get the diagnosis as it is not a curable illness.
“ This condition does not have a cure; it will be with me for the duration of my entire life. ”
The scariest part about IBD for me was the unknown. Not knowing when a symptom will hit you, how severe it will be, not knowing if you can make it to plans and outings, and not knowing if it's an IBD flare or the flu, always having to be afraid, fearing the unpredictable. I had never met anyone else with my condition, and I did not have anyone to ask questions about this. I was unable to comprehend why I got this and was really unsure about how I will get through it. Accepting this condition took me a long time. I realised something through this process, the importance of support. If we have the right kind of support and care team, slowly but steadily we will see improvements. Above all, we will be able to accept our condition, and it makes the predicament of the unknown a little less scary.
References:
Baumgart, D., & Sandborn, W. (2012). Crohn's disease. The Lancet, 380(9853), 1590-1605. https://doi.org/10.1016/s0140-6736(12)60026-9
Pritt, B., & Clark, C. (2008). Amebiasis. Mayo Clinic Proceedings, 83(10), 1154-1160. https://doi.org/10.4065/83.10.1154