By Varada Srivastava from India
Since I was diagnosed with Crohn's disease, I've had trouble deciding who to tell and how to approach the subject of my chronic condition. It is difficult to casually bring up this topic in conversation. Usually, when you tell someone you have an incurable illness, the conversation becomes difficult for everyone. However, there are occasions when it can be cathartic and just what you need to strengthen your connection. This is what I've learned about Crohn's disease after having numerous awkward and amazing conversations about it.
It might be difficult to talk about your illness depending on where you are in your IBD journey or how open you are as a person. I found it quite difficult to discuss my diagnosis of Crohn's disease in the early years since I was still coming to terms with it. Seven years later, I feel more at ease discussing it.
The choice of whom to tell is even another challenge. When I was diagnosed, I was still in school, and I had no control over who knew about it. The majority of my students and teachers were aware because they watched me going through the diagnosing process. However, nobody was aware of it when I arrived at the university. I felt in charge of the coversation as a result, but I was also afraid about how other people might respond. Would they treat such a significant aspect of my life seriously? - was something I frequently wondered to myself.
I've had great luck to be surrounded by people who have supported me greatly while I've been a student. But negative experiences with this are inescapable. There will be people who downplay your difficulty or don't react with the greatest degree of empathy. We frequently believe that our condition is too complex to explain in professional situations or that it is private and should not be mentioned in the workplace. However, there are situations when you must inform others for logistical reasons, such as your manager, HR, or lecturers. They must be aware in order to offer you a little more flexibility at work. It might not be necessary to go into great depth about inflammatory bowel disease (IBD) at this point, but letting them know that you might need a few extra sick days or extensions and explaining the need for them may be beneficial in the long term.
Keep in mind that people might ask follow-up questions and it's completely acceptable if you don't want to elaborate. You decide how much information you want to share with them. Nevertheless, I discovered that when you have an incurable condition, being honest about it is a crucial and necessary process (even if you do it occasionally with the wrong people). The majority of people are kind and will react positively. But if not, remember that the conversation about your chronic illness doesn’t have to be seamless each and every time you have it. You can view it as a learning opportunity and overtime you’ll learn what details you feel comfortable disclosing, and with whom.
Featured photo by Koma Tang from Pexels.