By: Isabela Hernandez
There are going to be days when your IBD is acting up, and you do not feel up to going to events or seeing friends you’ve committed to seeing. Yet, you feel guilty for saying you don’t feel well. I used to struggle with this heavily. I would have a plan with friends that was made in advance, but the morning of, I’d wake up feeling extremely sick. Many thoughts would be going through my head. Do I go and stay in pain? Do I say I’m sick; would they believe me if I say I’m sick? Why do I feel guilty for changing my mind? I would try to explain to the people around me how I was feeling, but I could see in their faces they didn’t really understand how intensely my IBD affects me, especially socially. To them, me saying no was me bailing on spending quality time with friends for selfish reasons. For me, saying no was the only way I could preserve the sanctity of my physical and mental health. These experiences with friends have taught me many things.
There is NO reason we need to feel guilty for prioritizing our health, whether that be saying no to a friend or backing out of a plan last minute due to symptoms.
If your friends don’t try to understand how your IBD affects your life socially, then it may be time to reevaluate what these friendships mean to you.
Find healthy ways to communicate with the people you are close with to let them better understand your IBD - if you don’t let them in, they’ll never truly get to know you and your disease.
Be open with YOURSELF about what you feel and adjust your day based on that. Everyday is different and that’s ok.
Do what’s best for you!
Now, those around me know when I say, “I’m having some symptoms today, I don’t think I can go,” that it is not personal, but I need to focus on myself that day. I’ve found people who have learned to respect that and really understand what I feel. I challenge you to put yourself first and learn to prioritize your health, even when it’s hard.
This article is sponsored by Trellus
Trellus envisions a world where every person with a chronic condition has hope and thrives. Their mission is to elevate the quality and delivery of expert-driven personalized care for people with chronic conditions by fostering resilience, cultivating learning, and connecting all partners in care.